Family Battle over Cattle. Suggestions?

[CMAHerefords]

I am currently in a partnership with a family member. Together we own about 20 cows. (she has ~10). Recently she has decided she would like to sell her cattle. I have tried to contact her about potentially buying her cattle (by mail, phone, and text message) and she does not return anything. I have taken solo care of her cattle for about 3 years with hardly any return. I have paid for all breeding, vet work, registrations, as well as labor on her cows and show cattle. Over the years I have done roughly 95% of the work.

I was wondering what suggestions anybody had for what I should do next? How do I either get reembersed or get the cattle?

What kind of laws are out there that deal with this?

I am trying not to have this get ugly but I want to protect myself.

 

[linnettejane]

have you went to her house, rang the door bell?  face to face talk it out?

 

[jbzdad]

sounds like you have quite a bit of sweat equity in this deal and it gets split up you want a value for your efforts... ... in the first place I think you have to decide if the relationship with her is more important than the sweat equity you have ... over time you will probably decide that your relationship is more important than this equity... I also suspect that there are more than 2 personalities involved here

It would be nice if you could both agree on the value of the sweat equity  total dollars ... then if you are interested in buying her out can you agree on a value for her cattle... if so this is a math problem...

I doubt you have a legal remedy... if she decides to sell not  much you can do... if you think it might work she may be more inclined to sell to"someone else" than to you... you might work a deal with that " someone else" to buy back the ones you are interested in...

one other thing... if this doesn't go well face to face you may have  someone in the community who could be a go between ... this may help to get emotions on the back burner..

 

[mainegirl]

I can somewhat relate to you on this one. My brother is more interested in tractor pulling and having fun. Now that his cows are about to calve he decided he wants to sell them to get some spending money. My dad and I are in your shoes with the work, costs, etc. He just owns the cows. We asked him what he wants for them and plan on buying them from him after they calve. We decided not to push the "I've done all of this and you've only done this" just because we didn't want to stir up the pot, especially since we want to buy them from him and he's family of course. I agree with taking into consideration the relationship aspect of it too. We were wronged by my cousin and ended up going to court over it. It got pretty ugly and we haven't spoke in almost 5 years now. Family gatherings aren't the same anymore. So, my advice is to remain as civil as possible, but don't let her walk all over you. Try and find some kind of compromise. Good Luck!

 

[chambero]

Business and family - including the cattle business - are a bad idea in most situations if they can be avoided.  Money is always equal - but the work seldom is.

Let her sell her cows and you keep going with yours - if you've ever decided upon which ones are yours.  If not, tell her that in return for you having done all the work you get to pick which ones are yours.  In the long term that is likely the most painless solution.

 

[Mueller Show Cattle]

Business and family - including the cattle business - are a bad idea in most situations if they can be avoided.  Money is always equal - but the work seldom is.

I agree with this comment, if at all possible keep family and business separate and if you do have to do business with family, have everything laid out at the beginning so there is no surprises and no torn families. My dad and uncle were in cattle business together and had a disagreement on how things should have been run. I agreed with my dad but also like hanging out with my uncle, now there is that tension there, makes things ruff as they don't get along and my dad sold his half out.

My question is you said you have about 20 cows and she owns 10, did you guys both buy all the cows together so each cow is belonging to both of you. If so this could get tricky as you have to decide which cows belongs to who. Will she come in and say all the better breeding cows and the younger cows are hers? I agree, if it was me, I would suck up the sweat money and leave that alone if it is a tricky situation, look at market value in your area and if she is willing to, give her 50% of what your total herd is worth and not have a family fight as down the road you will be glad you didn't even though you might be firm on your grounds. I am hoping you guys also split all the bills such as vet and feed bills or you could have fun getting that money back. Good Luck!

 

[AAOK]

Business and family - including the cattle business - are a bad idea in most situations if they can be avoided.  Money is always equal - but the work seldom is.

Let her sell her cows and you keep going with yours - if you've ever decided upon which ones are yours.  If not, tell her that in return for you having done all the work you get to pick which ones are yours.   In the long term that is likely the most painless solution.

Great advice from Chambero.  Let her sell her cows, walk away from that partnership, and put it behind you.

 

[hamburgman]

If they are going to auction buy them there

 

[justintime]

Business and family - including the cattle business - are a bad idea in most situations if they can be avoided.  Money is always equal - but the work seldom is.

Let her sell her cows and you keep going with yours - if you've ever decided upon which ones are yours.  If not, tell her that in return for you having done all the work you get to pick which ones are yours.   In the long term that is likely the most painless solution.

Great advice from Chambero.  Let her sell her cows, walk away from that partnership, and put it behind you.

I agree with Chambero and AAOK.... Let her decide what she wants to do... an auction may be best as she may think you are ripping her off. In any event, you have to talk with her .... and in a cival manner. Even though she is part of the family she may not think about this the same as you do. Make her an offer, if you want to buy the cows. If she does not agree with your offer, then just let her sell the cows and move on. I have seen many families blown apart of a few dollars or a few cows, and it simply is not worth it.You both have a lot of life to live yet, and you don't need something like this to drive a huge wedge between you. It just isn't worth it, even if you think you are right!!
Believe me, if you are in this business more than a little while, there will be lots of other occasions when you think you have been wronged, and it will eat your soul out of you allow it to do so.

 

[jbzdad]

leave it to justintime and chambrero to say better than I what I was trying to say

 

[justintime]

By the name of this thread " Family battle over cattle" it sounds like you are in a fight with your sister, yet you mention that you have not been able to contact her. If that is the case, it sounds like it is a one sided battle. I have no idea why yoru sister will not respond but it is best for you to suck it in and take a few deep breaths, as if you attack her head on when you eventually do make contact, it may actually make things worse.

Several years ago, I leased a set of cows from two brothers who farmed near us. Everything was fine for a few years, until they got feuding over an estate, and in the next few years I watched these two idiots literally blow hundreds of thousands of dollars in legal costs as they sued each other. In the end they were left with literally nothing left. If there were any winners, it was their lawyers. Total stupidity in my opinion. Life is far too short to carry this inside very long. Just dissolve your partnership in whatever way you can. If you don't get all you think you should for your work, just move on and forget it. Lots of things in life are far from being fair.

A friend of mine has a saying about partnerships in the cattle business. He says " partnerships are only good for one thing.... that is splitting a loss "

 

[uluru]

I don't normally respond to these types of posts however, I have beeen in the financial business for a long time and the toughest disputes to reconcile are family ones.
A combination of ego and so called ownership and pride.
Don't let the few dollars for few cows and some labor create an issue with the family relationship that should be worth more than money or cows.
Keep the laywers out of it because they will suck you dry. 
Walk away if necessary to keep a family relationship intact.
Over the long period of your life it will be worth it........Bob

 

[MCC]

Sometimes you have to just walk away with your head held high and chalk it up to experiance no matter how bad it hurts. Had a similar experiance with my sister many years ago. I got bullheaded and wasn't giving in. Wish I had kept my mouth shut and gave in because she won't hardly speak to me anymore.

 

[GoWyo]

If she wants to run her cows to the auction yard, go on sale day and buy the ones you want.  Fair for all.  Now as for picking whose is whose, you may have to try the alternating selections method.  Flip a coin or rock/paper/scissors for the first pick and then make alternating selections of cows.  If she goes to the sale barn with hers, then you have another chance and she gets a fair price.

 

[kfacres]

does she know one cow from another? does she know the good ones from the bad ones? 

I'd pick out the worser ones, call them hers-- and let her have them all.. Best way to cull the herd....

<party>

or you could go buy them back if that doesn't work... 

 

[McM93]

does she know one cow from another? does she know the good ones from the bad ones? 

I'd pick out the worser ones, call them hers-- and let her have them all.. Best way to cull the herd....

<party>

or you could go buy them back if that doesn't work... 

This hit me as really funny at first. However, if she needs cash and has little emotional attachment...Previous posters are correct, no lawyers, they are the only ones that always win...

 

[CAB]

If she wants to run her cows to the auction yard, go on sale day and buy the ones you want.  Fair for all.  Now as for picking whose is whose, you may have to try the alternating selections method.  Flip a coin or rock/paper/scissors for the first pick and then make alternating selections of cows.  If she goes to the sale barn with hers, then you have another chance and she gets a fair price.

In the flip a coin scenario, we usually let the person who loses the call get the # 2 & 3 pick then alternate picks after that.

 

[chambero]

On the picking cattle topic, its not your fault if she doesn't know which ones are the best ones.  It's also not your responsibility to tell her.  Consider that your intellectual property earned through your hard work.  Play dumb - a cow is a cow to the vast majority of folks.