Negativity

[OH Breeder]

We had a corporate call on dealing with negative people.How to handle objections and remain positive.  I thought it was interesting the number one rule is as follows.....

1) Don't get into an argument
One of the most important things I learned is not to debate with a negative person. A negative person likely has very staunch views and isn't going to change that just because of what you said. Whatever you say, he/she can find 10 different reasons to back up his/her viewpoint. The discussion will just swirl into more negativity, and you pull yourself down in the process. You can give constructive comments, and if the person rebutts with no signs of backing down, don't engage further.

If you follow some of the negative post on this forum the rebuttal seems to follow fairly quickly as described in the rules for dealing with negativity.

So what is the upside, that is another rule. LOOK for the positive. Try and find the positive in any situation. So the one thing I found positive about some of the negativity was also described.

When dealing with negative people, use it as a motivator. Use those negative comments as a motivator to move forward and stay focused on your dream. If you didn't have these people you may remain in the spot or get comfortable. Sometimes negativity should give you a "kick" to move ahead.  

 

[rarebirdz]

I no I should try to follow thx for posting

 

[simmyman67]

Very useful info here!

 

[CarleyE]

Very true, good point! (clapping)

 

[kfacres]

thanks, you're so kind... :I couldn't have said it better myself.

Which is why I'm on here... to share some thoughts, learn some stuff... and most importantely- help the world a more profitable, better place with better livestock... <beer>

 

[vanridge]

My sister in law ( who I respect a lot) always reminds me to feel sorry for people who are always negative and who are always complaining. They have a hard life because they choose to make themselves unhappy. Like OH signature says "Don't sweat the small stuff, life is too short." Thanks for the post OH!

 

[Stewart]

Insecurity breeds negativity

 

[linnettejane]

if this had a "like" button, i would push it  (clapping)

 

[iowabeef]

This is one of the best posts ever.  People need to realize they can disagree and debate without being so negative.  Discussion is good...constant negativity is not.  I am learning it is best to simply ignore the chronically negative and move on in discussion

 

[OH Breeder]

thanks, you're so kind... :I couldn't have said it better myself.

Which is why I'm on here... to share some thoughts, learn some stuff... and most importantely- help the world a more profitable, better place with better livestock... <beer>

This wasn't directed toward anyone in particular. But... since you commented....sometimes you can loose the point of your message because it buried with negativity. You may have good intentions but the delivery is so bad it gets killed and you are dismissed. I respect what you are trying to do and think you are a bright young man. Not saying it has to be roses and sunshine all the time either but at some point you have to find a way to express yourself that doesn't turn everyone off. If you true message is to learn and help then you really need to evaluate how you come across. Believe me...in the future...it will get you much much further in this world.

 

[knabe]

negativity can be measured by the lack of distinction between the subjective and the objective.

that value can be squared when someone sorts them.

 

[jason]

If you don't follow that status quo, it seems that you can become a magnet of negativity or doubts from people around you.  If you let that doubt creep into your head, your doomed. 

 

[savaged]

Well, that explains everything, and particularly why I live in a van down by the river.

 

[shortii]

You are 100% correct and I apologize for some of my comments I have made. I was way out of line.

 

[justintime]

Thanks for posting this. It is yet another reminder to me to ignore the negativity that appears on here from time to time. As most of you know, I have been guilty of the first point made here, ie:don't get into the argument.  I always tell myself to just ignore the negative postings, and I have been "reasonably" able to do so. My problem arises when the negativity swings into personal attacks, and I find myself almost compelled to respond... and I almost always regret doing this, as it is impossible to win with people with this attitude.(" win" is probably a poor choice of wording, as winning is not usually the issue at hand, it is just setting the record straight and correctly) I also seem to have problems not responding to someone ridiculing or making jokes about someone who is new to this business and trying to learn something on this board. When I do respond to these negative posts, it is always foremost in my mind, to do so in a reasonable manner and try to not get pulled into the negativity the poster has. I have never been able to understand people who display such negativity. This has nothing to do with difference of opinions ( which is normal and good). I often wonder how miserable life must seem to people like this.

I agree that we do not have to agree on issues and different points of view can help to stretch your own mind to see the many sides of any issue. Good debate is educational and helps each of us fine tune our own opinions, and also understand opposing points of view. I think that negativity is also bad as it can reduce or even stop good debate. People get to a point where they are afraid to express their points of view because they do not want to start a confrontation.  Personally, I hate confrontation, but I will get involved when I see personal attacks on anyone, including me.

 

[vc]

I spent 20 years at a large corporation, we went through all kinds of classes on how to deal with people, writting e:mails, confrontations, etc.

The one that sticks out is being direct and non-punishing when dealing with people. You can get your point across with out offending anyone.

Example
Question: What do you think of bulls X?

Punishing answer: I think he is junk, why would you even consider breeding to a piece like that? I think they should have steered him and killed the cow he came out of.
Non punishing answer: He is not my first choice, there are several bulls that I think are better breeding options, you should look at bull y,z,or K.

Both basically say the same thing, you do not like the bull, one just gets your point across with out making you sound like a donkeys hind end.