You Might be a REDNECK if........

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shorthorns r us

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(lol) (lol)  i am about to start taking this personally if y'all don't stop talking about me.  (lol) (lol)
 

Steered

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If  you take your wife out for dinner and a show for her birthday and it involves the 4-H food stand and a hog show.  Did that last year..
 

afhm

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If you have ever done your Christmas/birthday/anniversary shopping at a truck stop.
If you have a can of Hocus Pocus in the shower.
If you have a can of Hocus Pocus in the laundry room.
If your nails are always black from touch up paint.
If your family tree doesn't fork.
If your retirement fund depends on the pick 6 lotto.
If you have ever cleaned tractor/truck parts in the kitchen sink/bath tub.
IF you use a stick to see how much gas in your truck because the gauge is broken.
If you have ever driven a tractor, lawn mower or atv to town or school.
If the sunshine has to be piped in to your house.
If your lawnmower has 4 legs instead of 4 wheels.
If your cow pens are made out of old box springs.
If you consider speed week in Daytona a national holiday.
If you consider road kill fast food.
If your luggage is made by Hefty.
If you have ever used leaves for toilet paper
 

afhm

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The worst part about all of this is, we can all relate to or have done some of these things ( I know I have).  Good thing we can laugh at ourselves.
 

ROAD WARRIOR

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You might just be a red neck if you have a cow family named after your daughter ( Yep done it!)
                                              If you plan a family vaccation by doing herd tours out and back
                                              If you consider a bull sale 14 hours from home a vaccation
                                              If you have ever bought your wife (now ex) a squeeze chute for her birthday
                                              If the refridgerator in the barn works and the one in the house doesn't
                                              If the barn office is nicer than your living room
                                              If your living room looks more like a tack room
                                             
                                              I are one!
 

NHR

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You might be a redneck if you use DMSO to cure all your pains and aches and swellings.
 

afhm

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How about if you have more director's chairs in you living room than recliners.
If your coffee table is a piece of plywood sitting on top of cinder blocks or milk crates.
 

garybob

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First of all, COWZ, that's Institution of Applied Transportation and Logistics Technology. Second,  (clapping), I did this one time ( true GaryBob story). Back in the Eighties, when Country was making a comeback on the club scene, I remember standing around with some buddies by the edge of the dance floor, as the ladies were Line Dancing. Not soon afterward, someome asked me "what do you think abiut all this, out there on the dance floor?"  I looked up at him and said, " I placed this class 4-1-3-2!, Beginning with the Brunette in the Pink Lawmans"......I went through the whole set of reasons.

Oh, the things I learned in College.
 

cowz

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Livestock judging does teach some important life skills.  Remember what happens in the van, stays in the van. O0
 

frm_girl

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you walk all of your show cattle up and down the driveway on a daily bases
 

ELBEE

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Blue Rapids, Kansas
This actually happened about three years ago at one of my wife's OB appointments. Believe me the lady doctor looks at guys wearing a Stetson in a different light now! ......If you ask the OB why she can't just give your wife a shot of Lute to bring her in.
 

DL

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deep said:
  Instead of a rocking chair on your front porch, you have a washing machine    ;)



  (dog)

WOW DEEP -  welcome  back have missed you!
 

NHR

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ELBEE said:
This actually happened about three years ago at one of my wife's OB appointments. Believe me the lady doctor looks at guys wearing a Stetson in a different light now! ......If you ask the OB why she can't just give your wife a shot of Lute to bring her in.

Now that is just greatness.
 

shorthorns r us

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garybob said:
First of all, COWZ, that's Institution of Applied Transportation and Logistics Technology. Second,  (clapping), I did this one time ( true GaryBob story). Back in the Eighties, when Country was making a comeback on the club scene, I remember standing around with some buddies by the edge of the dance floor, as the ladies were Line Dancing. Not soon afterward, someome asked me "what do you think abiut all this, out there on the dance floor?"  I looked up at him and said, " I placed this class 4-1-3-2!, Beginning with the Brunette in the Pink Lawmans"......I went through the whole set of reasons.

Oh, the things I learned in College.

This is a border war thing; so, dont try getting offended folks.

Since you're from Arkansas and all ... what specie were they?
 

ba

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Jul 4, 2007
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Rockville Indiana
You go out for your anniversary for supper
complementary supper at the sale

was closer to the due date of my oldest one
off by2 days
doctor off by all most3 weeks

used old lute slide calculator
 

Jill

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Gardner, KS
Steered said:
If  you take your wife out for dinner and a show for her birthday and it involves the 4-H food stand and a hog show.  Did that last year..
The sad thing is your bride was thrilled you were such a BIG spender, but I think you have forgotten the beautiful lodging accomdations you provided for her.  The glow could be seen for miles around. (lol), Earl
 

Steered

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Spring Hill, Ks
Jill & Earl,
I don't want to spoil her too much.. she will come to expect it.  As for the lodging... It was  a new tent after all.  I hope that the glow didn't keep you up! (lol)  It looks like it is going to be a hot fair next week.  See Ya.
 
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