List of simile's,quotes,one liners,bumper stickers lyric lines

[oakbar]

" He was so crooked that when he died, they just sharpened his toe nails and screwed him in the ground"

"Never Squat with your spurs on!!"

"Treat your girl like a thoroughbred and she'll never turn into an old nag!"

 

[linnettejane]

my husband is a "few" years older than me  ....whenever someone asks him if he is going to have anymore kids he replies...."nah...i'm getting a little to long in the tooth..." 

 

[simtal]

Monica lewinsky : I'm voting republican this time, those democrats left a bad taste in my mouth.

    General Patton, do you read the bible? I sure do, every goddamn day!"-patton (1970)
   
"Matters of style swim with the current, matters of principle stand like a rock"

    "The writing on the wall may be a forgery"

    "Pick the dog with the least fleas"-Walltstreet

Head on her like a bastard cat

Ran 20 yard dash in a 10 yard gym (describing a short fronted one)

You can't rape the willing

When in rome (really funny to say when it doesn't make sense)

Like a fly on $hit

counldn't hit a bull in the ass with a bass fiddle

so dumb you couldn't pour piss outta of a boot

madder than a skinhead watching the jeffersons

hotter than two foxes humpin in forest fire

hotter than two rabbits in a wool sock

and finally,

gotta piss like a race horse getting chased by a glue truck at the kentucky derby!

 

[shortdawg]

It's raining like a cow peeing on a flat rock

 

[vet tech]

vet tech..."The times they are a changing".

finally somebody who understands. There isn't a better quote better than that one for today.

 

[aj]

four dead in Ohio

 

[farmboy]

four dead in Ohio

you would not beleive how looooooooong i thought it was po'(poor) dad in ohio

needless to say i felt like a complete idiot when i realized it  O0

 

[hereford kid]

I don't skinny dip; i chunky dunk!

 

[aj]

zach (clapping) thought I'd throw in a anti war lyric.At first I thought it was a line about the kent state shootings by the national gaurdsman but I think it was just a headline in the paper he wrote the song about.

 

[farmboy]

well it is about kent state

 

[aj]

Well I wasn't sure I heard the story of the song on classic vinyl the other day.Kent state must be in Ohio.

 

[aj]

Okie computer:def  Big chief tablet and a pencil. ;D

 

[itk]

If at first you don't succeed, lower your standards.

 

[Steer Boy 101]

"I aint stalkin maam i just saw u walking" yeah girls still look at me funny faced

 

[amss101]

How about...Surround yourself with idiots so you get to be the smart one...or something of that nature.

 

[shortdawg]

" Man, he looks like he fell out of the ugly tree and hit every limb".

 

[aj]

"People who don't have a sense of humor about themselves will die bitter old people."

 

[Dusty]

She'd make a freight train take a dirt road

 

[aj]

"|If you mind your manners...and are as quiet as a mouse-someday you'll own a home....as big as a house.

 

[knabe]

i felt like a one legged man at a butt kickin contest.